Okay, so I'm totally fine today. I have a headache, probably partially due to the tears last night and partially due to just the fact that I get headaches now, but I'm fine.
I don't know what happened last night. I was just having a total Stacy Pity Party. I seriously came home, wrote that blog and then afterward laid my head down on Kevin's lap as he was watching tv and just cried. He was being all sweet and trying to ask me questions to help me, but I didn't need that, I just needed to cry! So, after awhile, he let me do just that. I think I must have had tears rolling down my face for about 15 minutes before I finally thought, "This is ridiculous." I got up, went and took a long, hot shower, and cried some more as I did that! I have never experienced anything like it! Then I got out, got ready for bed, had a glass of nice, cold water and then snuggled and prayed with Kevin before falling off to sleep. Strange. There's no explanation for that, truly. I have never just cried and not had any reason whatsoever.
A wonderful thing happened as we were praying though. Kevin had his hand on my belly, and the Wee One just started going nuts in there! It was flipping all around. I kept laughing and Kevin would say, "Stop laughing! I can't feel it as well!" I was holding my breath trying to keep from laughing and Kev was loving every minute of it. He has felt kicks and jabs here and there, but nothing like the constant gymnastics that were going on last night. It was a wonderful end to an otherwise strange evening.
Today was a new, fresh day. I woke up and prayed "Lord, please let it be a better day...please help me not to cry." Well, the not crying part didn't happen, but it wasn't for an unknown reason. We had our last staff meeting. There are several people leaving this year, and I was sad to see them go. Our staff is pretty tight, and we love each other! As I listened to what some people had to say about those staff members, the waterworks started. Then Seren stood up and said some beautiful words to me and I just lost it. Man, I can't imagine my life without that girl in it. God definitely knew what He was doing when he had me stay put at the school two years ago and brought her there. She's my best girl friend now, and we love how our hubbies are close too. It's sort of strange though, because this year it was almost like every aspect of our lives was intertwined-we worked together, hung out on weekends, our hubbies played hockey together and now ball together. We vacationed together and now, we won't be together every single day. I think there were FEW days that went by that I didn't see her at least once if not more. I guess the phone calls will become more frequent. Plus, we'll still probably spend tons of weekends together...life just happens that way! Anyway, her words brought me to tears but in a good way.
It was also nice to hear all of the kind words from fellow staff members. They have been praying for this little one, and for Kev and I, and I am so humbled by that. There were so many well wishes, and some of the women expressed the desire to throw us a baby shower after the Wee One is born! I look forward to that!
Another thing that was great about today? I bought two things for the baby. These are the first things I have purchased. Me, personally. It took me almost 32 weeks to get there. I was at the mall and found two adorable onesies for $8 and $3 at Gap and Old Navy. They were too adorable! I couldn't pass them up! It was a huge step for me to actually buy them though. It felt good, hopeful, and right.
I don't know what happened last night. I was just having a total Stacy Pity Party. I seriously came home, wrote that blog and then afterward laid my head down on Kevin's lap as he was watching tv and just cried. He was being all sweet and trying to ask me questions to help me, but I didn't need that, I just needed to cry! So, after awhile, he let me do just that. I think I must have had tears rolling down my face for about 15 minutes before I finally thought, "This is ridiculous." I got up, went and took a long, hot shower, and cried some more as I did that! I have never experienced anything like it! Then I got out, got ready for bed, had a glass of nice, cold water and then snuggled and prayed with Kevin before falling off to sleep. Strange. There's no explanation for that, truly. I have never just cried and not had any reason whatsoever.
A wonderful thing happened as we were praying though. Kevin had his hand on my belly, and the Wee One just started going nuts in there! It was flipping all around. I kept laughing and Kevin would say, "Stop laughing! I can't feel it as well!" I was holding my breath trying to keep from laughing and Kev was loving every minute of it. He has felt kicks and jabs here and there, but nothing like the constant gymnastics that were going on last night. It was a wonderful end to an otherwise strange evening.
Today was a new, fresh day. I woke up and prayed "Lord, please let it be a better day...please help me not to cry." Well, the not crying part didn't happen, but it wasn't for an unknown reason. We had our last staff meeting. There are several people leaving this year, and I was sad to see them go. Our staff is pretty tight, and we love each other! As I listened to what some people had to say about those staff members, the waterworks started. Then Seren stood up and said some beautiful words to me and I just lost it. Man, I can't imagine my life without that girl in it. God definitely knew what He was doing when he had me stay put at the school two years ago and brought her there. She's my best girl friend now, and we love how our hubbies are close too. It's sort of strange though, because this year it was almost like every aspect of our lives was intertwined-we worked together, hung out on weekends, our hubbies played hockey together and now ball together. We vacationed together and now, we won't be together every single day. I think there were FEW days that went by that I didn't see her at least once if not more. I guess the phone calls will become more frequent. Plus, we'll still probably spend tons of weekends together...life just happens that way! Anyway, her words brought me to tears but in a good way.
It was also nice to hear all of the kind words from fellow staff members. They have been praying for this little one, and for Kev and I, and I am so humbled by that. There were so many well wishes, and some of the women expressed the desire to throw us a baby shower after the Wee One is born! I look forward to that!
Another thing that was great about today? I bought two things for the baby. These are the first things I have purchased. Me, personally. It took me almost 32 weeks to get there. I was at the mall and found two adorable onesies for $8 and $3 at Gap and Old Navy. They were too adorable! I couldn't pass them up! It was a huge step for me to actually buy them though. It felt good, hopeful, and right.
Here is one of the adorable onesies I purchased...it says "Give Peas a Chance." Too Cute! It's all organic cotton and best of all...it was only $3.50!
Finally, the weather today was AMAZING! Summer is here! I was driving to work and crossing the Bridge and looked over. It was stunning! The water was a gorgeous blue, everything was bright green due to the rain and the sun was shining fiercely. I couldn't help it! I said, "THANKS Lord!"
I'm thankful for a better day...the pity party is over...I'm almost embarrassed about it. Almost, but not quite!
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