Our Gift

I will never forget that day.  My baby brother was getting married to the love of his life, and it was the morning of their wedding.  We were all hanging out at our hotel getting ready for the big event.  I was in the bathroom getting dressed for the day.  Suddenly, I felt cramping.  Severe cramping.

I was just barely pregnant.  In fact, just the weekend before I had experienced the nausea and such that comes with the first trimester.  I had discovered that I was pregnant!  I was full of joy, but also fear.  I had already experienced a miscarriage after the birth of Rusty.  I was fearful of another one, but feeling sick and tired enough to be confident that this one would be ok.

Then came the cramping, and later, the bleeding.  I lost it.  I was already emotional about the fact that my baby brother was getting married.  I loved his fiance, but he was my baby brother.  The thought of losing a baby on top of that, on this happy yet emotional day, was too much for my heart to handle.  I holed up in the bathroom and dissolved into tears.  My Nessa came in and comforted me.  I will never forget the words I said, "If this one is lost, I am done.  I don't think I can continue to do this."

Well, that one was not lost.  We returned home after that weekend and the first thing I did was make an emergency trip to see my doctor.  We ran blood tests, but the most important thing she did was get me in for an ultrasound as soon as possible.  There it was, that little heart beating away on the screen.  The tears poured down my face.

Now that little heartbeat is our wonderful Rocky.  He is rambunctious.  He is mischievous.  He is full of joy.  The boy smiles all of the time!  He babbles away.  He opens every cupboard in the house and unloads it...several times a day.  He is a little ball of fire and a source of absolute and complete joy in our lives.  He is a gift. 

I often forget about that day, and I am actually thankful that it happened on a day that had so much meaning in our lives anyway.  Every year when I celebrate another year of marriage for my brother and sister-in-law I will also be celebrating another gift and joy...the fact that our little guy held on and is with us now, bringing us smiles and joy with each passing day.

Thank you Lord, for our precious gift!