deep sigh

I have a confession to make. I've been sitting in the glider rocker in my daughter's room just holding her, listening to her little breath whoosh in and out of her body as she sleeps, for over an hour. It's dark and absolutely peaceful. It's fill up my cup kind of stuff.

There are a million things I could be doing. Our laundry has gotten out of control in this week of Kev's sickness. (I never realized JUST how much laundry that man actually does!) The dishes are piled in the sink. Dinner is coming and I have no idea what I'm going to make. I'm not entirely sure what the boys are doing but I can hear them playing in their room next door and they sound happy so, you know, all is well.

This? I needed this. I need to gaze at her perfect, beautiful face. I need to pray for her right now and her future. I need to listen to her breathe and thank God that I get to hear those sweet little noises she makes as she sleeps. She is growing. So fast.

These moments don't happen often so when they do I am learning to sit and soak in them, to appreciate them. I'm learning to be in the right here and right now instead of worrying about what is to come. I'm learning to forgive myself if the house is a mess or I don't have that organic made from scratch gourmet dinner ready to go. I'm learning to allow my boys to just do whatever and that I don't have to always intervene. I'm learning to thank God for the little moments.

Back to staring at my daughter and restoring my soul with prayers and deep sighs.






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